I don’t think I’m better than you, I’m just more honest.

In the wake of political conventions and the continued kerfuffle on Facebook or the freeway (yup, I have a Mitt Romney sticker and I get the finger frequently, it’s charming) I’ve been thinking about the statements we make about ourselves, hoping to give weight to our political opinion. You know what I’m talking about: the anecdotes about our “gay friends” or “Catholic background” or “unemployed mom” or “(fill in a non-white ethnicity here) friend”. Now, the truth is, unless we live in a carefully scripted prime time comedy, we probably don’t have all that diverse of relationships, because we all tend to spend time with people who are like us – we like to DO things together, that’s how relationships are made. I love flea markets, mimosas at breakfast, ocean kayaking and eating outdoors, so most of my friends do too.

But we don’t talk about those nuances when we’re racing in to meet someone of a divergent political belief head-on. Oh no, with those folks we insist that our lives are straight out of a Bud Light commercial, in which no two people look or sound anything alike and yet everyone is magically partying in harmony. (That circumstance has actually happened to me on occasion, but more often in a religious setting then anywhere else, which just proves my uncool status in these debates).

But that’s where the crux of my discomfort lies. I don’t know why it’s so damn uncool to be honest. Everyone is running around insisting that they’re not racists or bigots or homophobes or jealous or mean or insecure or out-of-touch, and yet WE ALL ARE. I am not going to pound the pulpit like these convention speakers and pretend that I’m God Incarnate and have never thought a mean thought about someone who doesn’t look like me or think like me. I totally have, it’s embarrassing and petty, sure, but I bet you have, too. So has every other person who’s spending many hours trying to convince us of their squeaky-clean status.

This week, a fellow-BlogHer member wrote a piece about how she won’t let her kids watch Bill Nye the Science Guy because he was condescending about creationism in a recent interview. Of the 70 comments on the post, less than five were supportive of her parenting choice, and most were not disputing the issue at hand (creation vs. evolution and how we teach our kids) and instead sank to immediate name-calling and cruelty, making fun of this blogger for her beliefs and trying to humiliate anyone dared to speak up for her. These “open-minded” feminists were cruel beyond measure to someone who doesn’t think like them – a tiny, much-maligned minority of belief. I don’t know anything about this woman, but I do know that she wrote a piece about traditional conservative Christianity and was widely mocked for it.

I’ve heard a lot about being silenced and mocked lately, but it wasn’t from traditional conservative Christians. Where was it, again? Oh, right….

Sandra Fluke said at the Democratic National Convention that “many women are shut out and silenced”.

Kerry Washington said, also at the DNC, that: “Today there are people trying take away rights that our mothers, grandmothers and great-grandmothers fought for: our right to vote, our right to choose, affordable quality education, equal pay, access to health care. We the people can’t let that happen… The other side wants to take away our voice and render us invisible.”

At the DNC, Joe Biden said, “[The Democratic Party sees] a future where women once again control their own choices, their destiny, and their own health care. Ladies and gentlemen, Barack and I see a future, it’s in our DNA, where no one is forced to live in the shadows of intolerance.”

Boy, that alternate reality sounds downright terrible, doesn’t it? I spared you the pain of Fluke’s full commentary, but you can read the whole speech here. If her view of an America in which women are enslaved, mistreated, shut up and sidelined doesn’t shiver your timbers, I don’t know what will. (By the way, there is a place like that, and it’s not Alabama, it’s our good buddies in Libya and Iran.)

Something tells me that if the aforementioned blogger had written a piece about how she won’t allow her kids to attend a faith-based function or watch Fox News, there would have been applauding from the mountaintops. There would have comments galore about how every mom has the right to choose what’s best for her kids and how it’s our job to support her. If she had insisted that her children learn about cross-dressing or attend a same-sex wedding, we would all shrug and say, “Sure, go for it!” But somehow, because she’s standing up for a more traditional, less sexy view, it’s OK to trash her.

Is this the tolerance we’ve fought so long for? Is this women’s suffrage? Somehow we are sold this tripe about how all women need to band together in order to overcome a male-led world and earn equal pay, rights and voice, and yet we tear each other up over something as silly as a children’s television program. Women are not all alike just because we’re in possession of our very own vajayjay. Obviously, we all have more than enough vitriol inside us to make the world a very scary place to live – indeed, just look at what happens when people allow hate to rule their lives.

Again, this is not in America. This is in Egypt. No women are marching because women are slaves to their husbands and are not allowed to participate unless given direct permission.

I’m not going to assert that the anti-Bill Nye blogger I mentioned earlier is a Republican, because I have no idea what she believes (before you get your panties in a wad, I’m also not holding her up as a symbol of blog-perfection, I’m simply making a point). I’m also not pretending to know how her commenters will vote. However, I think it’s fascinating that the feminists, the “we are not invisible” folks, the ones who pound the pulpit about rights and compassion – only give those rights and compassion to people who look, sound and believe exactly like they do. Believe in Creation? You fool. Want to homeschool? Idiot. Vote Republican? Bigot. Pro-life? HOW ARE YOU ANTI-WOMEN, YOU CRUEL PERSON.

So let’s be honest. Let’s stop pretending that one political party has the corner on compassion. Let’s stop flinging around these foolish anecdotes about our super-multicultural lifestyle and how uber-tolerant we all are. Just read the comment section of any highly-trafficked blog-post – every last one of us has the capacity for deep ugliness, and screaming about equality, civil rights and tolerance does not make that go away.

The next person who tells me my political or religious beliefs make me a homophobe/racist/generic intolerant insult is going to get a big surprise. Rather than trotting out my civil accomplishments or defending my non-hater status, I’m going to just nod. “Yup,” I’ll say, “fortunately for me, my faith saves by grace and I have another shot today to live up to it.”

Conservatism and traditional Christianity may not whine about racism and equality, but it doesn’t lie about it either.

Jeremiah 17:9 – “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who can understand it?”

2012, Christianity, Culture with a side of Pop, Partisanship - Can't we all just get along?, Red and yellow, black and white.., Women: we're more than our ladyparts


  1. Alan Gonzalez

    You are right again. You know when people talk about honesty I think people dont realize that honesty is a learned trait and comes from what we learn as a child from the example of our family influences. Then once we are older honesty comes with a price. The cost is responsibility. When we make decisions whether they are honest or not we have or let me say should take responsibility. That is the biggest problem plaguing the country. Most people do not want to take responsibility as they are just happy being acted upon and not acting. Sorry for my little rant, but our country is in dismay, and my concern lies with my childrens future. Keep up the Good Fight!

  2. Being a southern man, I have had the unmitigated joy of running into far to many people who have been taught that people from south of the Mason-Dixon line usually handle snakes in church, we invented incest, and we eat dirt. None of us of course are educated, and if we have a job, its probably behind the butt end of a donkey, who is pulling the plow while we plant ‘taters’ in our overalls whilst barefoot.
    Mind you, my parents both graduated from Ivy League schools, Dad, Brown, Mum, Vassar, my grandfathers on both sides, Harvard and I myself cleaned off my dirty feet, and went the Brown route, and then U of Maryland and the University of Chicago for graduate work. Then a year in France working on a certificate in my field, and 2 years in Germany to the same end.
    I chose to by pass my sister, and married a German. Some where in there I managed to obtain some culture, several languages and I actually know what to use that small fork with 2 tines for.
    I am also conservative. Oh dear.
    The constant verbal attacks by the all inclusive left make me wonder just who do they accept under this big tent I hear about? The abortion rights mob seems to only like or respect ‘wymyn’ who have had one or more AB’s, and worship the men who run the clinics where the waste always looks human, and the blood is exceeded only by the income these ‘Doctors’ deposit. (thank you PP)
    Gays again seem to have no regard for anyone who does not belong to a group that utilizes LGBT in its nomenclature. If you are not a ‘proud’ parent of a gay, a gay supporter, or a sodomizer yourself, you are persona non grata.
    Christians are the enemy, while Muslims are not only acceptable, but if they are attempting to drive the Israelis into the sea, they well may be heros to these occupiers of everything that moves.
    The folks who find some kind of spritual identity with pagans and transexuals are a mystery to me. To be honest, I have no doubt we can vote out this administration. My question is more specific, “how do we deal with these Haters?”
    I do hope the FEMA camps they all swear the right has waiting has some truth, I can easily see Sandra Fluke, Brian Williams et al in a camp near Nome if possible.
    But I am a southern boy, I am not expected to be rational or kind.
    Isnt that right?

  3. Pingback: Today’s Wednesday Whiz is short. And nice. And good-looking. | The Cute Conservative

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